This Post is Mermaidish

So you've just found out that one of your FAVORITE people in the world is a mermaid. What are you going to do next?

I don't know what you are going to do, but I plan on just writing about things mermaid-related that happen to me. And answer questions. You've got some questions, right? (I'm a MERMAID for heaven's sake, how out of the norm! Are you not curious?) Leave questions in the comments and I will answer each of them.

On to today's tail. (Hee hee, sorry friends, I had to do that at least once.)

I'm sure that many of you are confused. I have a pool. I've been swimming with many of you... and none of you have seen my mermaid form.

My trick is simple. Insanely water-proof tape. Keeps sections of my skin dry when I am underwater. (Yes, that is totally cheating. I can't think that many other mermaids do this. But it works, so that's good for me.) The tape doesn't last forever so there is a limited time that I can use it. But if it starts to wear out, all I have to do is stick my hand above the water.

What a handy thing tape is.

I want to tell you more of what it is like to be a mermaid. How it feels to be able to stay under the water so long that I get confused by the sky and the land when I resurface. What it is like to swim with the great strength offered to me by my tail.

One of my favorite things to do is jump out of the water. There are several things that I have to consider before I try this move. First of all, it has to be far far far away from any humans. (How strange would it look to see a girl suddenly shoot up out of the water, hang in the air for a moment before falling back, and disappearing after hitting the water?)

The other thing to consider is the depth of the body of water that I am in. The water has to be rather deep for me to be able to get very high up out into the air. I swim a lot in Utah Lake so there are only a few places that are deep enough for me. 12-15 feet up out of the water is the thrill zone. Anything above that gets scary and dangerous and anything below that is a little bit boring. (You have to consider, when I say 12-15 feet, I mean that all of me is up out of the water. Counting my tail.)

The whole this is rather exhilarating.

:)

Also, this song is for you.

Only Slightly About Mermaids (And Not Really About Harry Potter Either.)

We'll get the mermaid bit over with first. I have a question. Do you like it? What do you want to see happen? What's the good, the bad? PLEASE GIVE ME SOME FEEDBACK! That's what the commenting button is for. :)

(Was that a little two forward? I'll try and be more subtle from now on.)

You can tell by looking at my blog that I post stuff when I am FEELING an EMOTION. Usually joy. Because I don't want to post when I am bored because then the writing will just be boring and you will then be bored.

But right now I am RATHER JOYFUL.

As most of you know, I am on a looooooong road trip. Right now we are in Canada. And on Eastern time. Which is weird for me. Because almost everyone I know is now running two hours behind me. So when I am asleep, every one is all active online! And when I wake up, everyone is all "sleeping!"

(Why am I telling you this? I forgot.)

(Oh yes. I remember.)

So, currently, all of my USUAL CROWD are all "We are stake dancing!" And I am all "Aww." Like the little fish in Gnomeo and Juliet.

And I am sitting here blogging.

(I forgot again why I am telling you this.)

LOOK! A DISTRACTION! (I promise that that distraction is made of awesome. Enjoy.)

Um. Um. Oh yes!

Amanda! If you are all boringly blogging while your posse hangs out at a delightful stake dance where they are sure to play Journey, why are you full of joy? (Especially as you just got your miserable AP Calc test score back!)

Gee, thanks for reminding me. You're a pal.

(Let's take a quick moment to say "boringly blogging" out loud. C'mon, do it! It's like eating Fruit Gushers. But wordy. And not fruit flavored.)

I am joyful because I am a fan of people who are fans of me. They are called friends. Also, I am a fan of vlogs. Also, I am a fan of obsessing over music. At the moment, Owl City and then, this Silly Love Song. Also, for my nerdy friends, I have for you a song about a Homicidal Squirrel.

You are welcome. :)

Hmmmm. So remember. Mermaid feedback, pronto. Ahem, I mean... I like mermaids... Do you? You should tell me about how you feel about them... And their stories... That are posted on blogs...

Alright Amanda, that's enough Amanda for one night.

Much love!

Last thing.

REAL last thing.

(Does anyone out there actually click on all of the links that I put in these things? Let me know if you do!(How about everyone just starts commenting please! That would be awesome!!!))

Pickled Mermaid

Dear friends,

Yeah. I know. I haven’t posted in ages. I have this motivation problem…

That’s actually why I’m coming to you today. I have an idea. I want to tell you the story of my secret life. I want to write it all out for you. But I need help. My idea is that I would write a chunk and post it on this here blog. You would then read it and yammer and demand the next chunk, thus giving me incentive to write! Good idea, yes, no? We’ll see how it works out.

Without further ado, I present to you:

PICKLED MERMAID

Or

THE COMPLETELY TRUE STORY OF MY LIFE AS A MERMAID

7/8/11

You just laughed, didn’t you? I know what you’re thinking (Here Amanda goes again, splashing along in her little pretend mermaid world. I bet she’ll say humorous things!)

Hah. Hah. Hah.

I know that you’re not going to believe me. That’s why telling you about it is such a great cover. No one actually believes my secrets.

I wouldn’t have believed it. Before it all happened, I thought that mermaids only lived in a Disney world, in a television show.

Am I glad that I became a mermaid? I honestly haven’t decided. There is so much good that came with my transformation, but also so many secrets, so many lies. So many consequences…

Your first question is how it happened. How did Amanda Peterson, Officially Normal Girl, become a fishy water junkie?

Well, the circumstances were just right…

Spring Break of 9^th grade. Our family was vacationing in Florida. The very first night, we went swimming in the pool at the hotel. It was a gorgeous pool, set 6 floors up and open to the entire sky. My siblings and I had a grand old time splashing and playing pretend. I’ve always had a soft spot in my heart for playing pretend mermaid games with my siblings (My brothers are always the dolphin companions.)

The sun was setting and the parents decided that it was time for dinner. “Come on!” They said, “We’ll order pizza to the hotel room.” My three youngest siblings instantly agreed to that plan, their toes were wrinkled and their arms were covered with goosebumps.

Andrew and I had other ideas. We begged and pleaded to be allowed to stay out a little bit longer so that we could swim in the inky black of the pool at nighttime. My parents rolled their eyes, but consented.

Andrew and I now ruled the pool. The orange of the sun fled and was filled in by the navy night sky. Twinkling stars were faintly reflected in the water. The moon came out and shone down on us.

We spent more time under the water than in the air. Andrew amused himself by diving over and over for a pool toy, but I sat at the bottom of the pool and just stared at the sky through the water.

As could be expected, Andrew eventually grew tired of swimming. He got out and sat by the edge. He said that he would only wait for me for ten minutes. Ten minutes was not enough time for me. The entire night would not have been enough time for me.

Such beauty, such peaceful grace of the night, surrounded me. Looking back, it is no wonder that something so magical happened at that lovely hour.

I was floating on my back at the center of the pool. My head broke through the brightest point of the moon’s reflection. In that instant, I fell. I fell through the water just how you would fall through air. My back hit the bottom of the pool. My limbs grew incredibly heavy. I had no air. I thought that I was going to die.

That is when my vision turned silver. It was like blacking out, except it felt like soaring through the sky.

When the silver faded and I came to, I was floating back on the surface of the pool like nothing had happened. When I questioned Andrew about it, he said that I had gone under for a moment, but had resurfaced moments later. I didn’t tell him about the silver light.

As chance had it, I didn’t end up swimming for the rest of our vacation. I got sick and stayed in bed while the rest of my family frolicked in the lovely water. I was so jealous.

Looking back, I am so glad that I got sick. If I hadn’t, I would have figured out about the tail in front of a bunch of strangers. And then everything would have been ruined.

How did you find out that you had been turned into a mermaid?

I found out when we returned home. When I drew up a deep bubble bath and plunged right in.

Wait, wait, wait! Yes? So water reveals your tail? That is correct. Then how didn’t you grow a tail every time you washed your hands or showered? Ah, yes, this is important. I can only access my mermaid form when I am completely submerged in the water.

So if it rains, I am okay. Most of me may be wet, but as long as I am not completely under water, my tail won’t appear.

That’s awfully convenient… I think you’re just making this up.

PSH! Because you’re such an expert on mermaids…